Fuckin’ Mayor
I’ve hated our mayor’s insane vendetta against O’Hare expansion, Mayor Daley, and the city of Chicago ever since he was elected. That’s okay, though. He lost, he’s an asshole, and with any luck he’ll finally be ousted once his anti-O’Hare fans realized he’s totally let them down. But not before he distracts everyone with yet another baffling attempt to show how much better our town is than any other suburb in the Chicagoland area. His mastermind: the Tour d’Elk Grove, which I’ve bitched about before but have mostly ignored and forgotten about…until last weekend when, with very little in the way of warning (sure, we’d all heard about it, but did anyone actually remember it was last weekend?), all the major thoroughfares in town were blocked off for our exciting international bike race. The big draw was supposed to be recent Tour de France winner Floyd Landis, but what with his recent problems, he’s been disqualified from the race.
In honor of a stupid, transparent, and ultimately failed attempt to obscure the failure of his political platform with pointless razzle-dazzle, I’ll now quote an article from August 6th’s Daily Herald (no longer available on the website):
>Elk Grove tour will pedal on in spite of Landis’ absence
BY TARA MALONE
Daily Herald Staff Writer
Posted Sunday, August 06, 2006The inaugural Tour of Elk Grove will cycle on, without Floyd Landis and his yellow jersey.
The Tour de France winner was fired by his team and stripped of his champion title Saturday after a backup doping sample corroborated what an earlier test revealed - suspiciously high levels of testosterone.
The 30-year-old cyclist who battled a degenerating hip to launch a historic comeback and clinch the title pledged to fight the charges and clear his name.
Elk Grove Village Mayor Craig Johnson, for one, stood by Landis Saturday, undaunted that he now is ineligible to race this weekend’s international cycling event.
“He would have been a perfect fit for this community and the race,” Johnson said, citing Landis’ professionalism and humble roots. “We move on. Our hope is he comes back next year as the two-time Tour de France champion.”
The two-day Alexian Brothers International Cycling Classic Tour of Elk Grove would have been his first American race since winning cycling’s premier title.
Landis’ absence clears the way for a competitive slate of riders to battle for the $25,000 prize in the 100-kilometer criterium race. The combined purse for all 16 races tops $150,000, one of the largest offered in any U.S. cycling event.
“There may be some riders who come out now because it wouldn’t be easy beating a Tour de France champion,” Johnson said.
Leading the pack is 30-year-old Lemont native Christian Vandevelde, who finished 35th in last month’s Tour de France. Another veteran of the 2,272-mile road race, David Zabriskie, 26, of Salt Lake City also plans to compete in Elk Grove.
Members of the Danish, Swiss and New Zealand national teams will compete as well.
In fact, Johnson - who shed 15 pounds since buying his first bike in April - will play host to two members of the Danish national team. Nearly 20 other Elk Grove families plan to take in international cyclists.
“I’ve got to get ready for the mayor’s challenge,” Johnson joked.
Johnson said village residents routinely pepper him with questions about this weekend’s event, asking for updates on racers and ideal viewing spots.
Elk Grove’s event follows another suburban race today with the 2nd annual Elgin Cycling Classic.
The Elk Grove race initially was conceived as a one-time event to mark the village’s 50th anniversary. Excitement coupled with strong support from sponsors - which include the Daily Herald - quickly persuaded village officials to make the Tour of Elk Grove an annual contest.
Next year’s race already is listed on the 2007 international cycling calendar.
“When they’re riding Tour de France and talking, they will be talking about the Tour of Elk Grove,” Johnson said. “Our race is definitely on the map. We are a legitimate, top notch event.”
My favorite part? The mayor bought his first bike in April (which explains why his “challenge” is a paltry seven miles, which I — an out-of-shape lump of crap — could do standing on my head). My second-favorite part? “We are a legitimate, top notch event.”
I almost hope the mayor is reelected for the sake of comedy.
Unfortunately, I missed this and forgot to post about it. REO Speedwagon recently lit up our 50th anniversary bash with their power-ballad-driven sonic creations. I’m sure it was awesome, but I was too busy wondering why Johnson spent $150,000 in taxpayer money to lure REO Speedwagon when Roselle spent $1200 to get three local bands. Johnson’s explanation, “Who doesn’t love REO?” leaves a lot to be desired. I guess it evens out since the winner of the recent home giveaway, has to pay between $150K and $180K on property taxes for their “free” house.
Posted by Stan on August 14, 2006 4:12 PM | Permalink | Random Musings | Digg It
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